Observations From Behind A Locked Gate!

by derrickvonbrose

Oh man, what a Sens game last night! An eight point outing for Alfie(!) – hard to believe we were talking retirement three months ago. That second line with Z-Bad and Turris has been just delightful to watch this fall. And Craig Anderson with a goal and shutout – someone cook that man a chicken dinner WITH a zesty orange marmalade sauce. Hockey <3 —-

But then it stops. You wake up and your semi quickly shrivels away. Those things, those goals, that marmalade sauce – they never happened. It’s just another day of PR (penis re-measurement), Allan Walsh mashing his keyboard with words against people he clearly never wants to work with ever again, and empty arenas and pained faces as far as the eye can see. It’s autumn madness (and in THIS economy). Here are some (non)bservations I have observed during the NHL lockout that has reached day ridiculous.

- This final season of Jersey Shore has been terrible – who wants to watch a pregnant Snooki and a sober The Situation awkwardly wade their way through the juiced up scene at Karma? (Goodspeed Seaside Heights).

- As fans of the Senday Observer are aware, I am lucky enough to live in “Leafs region” and thus have free access of LeafsTV. During the live hockey absence, the people at LeafsTV have decided to air a continuous diet of “classic” Leafs’ games. But what, if I may ask, is so classic about Leaf victories, which they broadcast in vast disproportion? — ah, there’s never a bad time for a friendly jab.

- The Binghamton Senators, aka as close as it gets, are off to mediocre 3-3-1 start to their season. However, at least one B-Sen has been sensational, “The #BSens have given up 10 goals in 94 minutes without Robin Lehner on the ice, and 10 goals in 332 minutes with him on the ice.” (Courtesy @PSBSens).

- People who assign the majority of the lockout blame on to the players side – I don’t get you. Some facts – the players are making all the concessions, the owners locked the doors and have all the keys, Bettman has a stupid face, HRR, percent signs, and in THIS economy.

- If you had Eugene Melnyk “crossing the picket line” first you win the pool. Wait a minute, he didn’t actually say anything damning to the owner’s position. Oh, it was that he said anything at all. Read about it here.

- Dust collecting on Sens gear I refuse to wear until this cruel joke is over.

Final thought: Gary Bettman and the owners are bullies, greed-induced, redundant and hypocritical. What was sunshine and lollipops in 2005 after the last CBA was ratified is now an unacceptable business model, (but still valid enough to handle $200 million in last-minute player contracts). At the end of the day only two things are certain – 1) fans want hockey yesterday. 2) Whatever CBA deal is eventually worked out, the owners will want more in 5-8 years and we will all be staring into the abyss once again.

Ahh, Allan Walsh hacked my blog.

(All observations published in collaboration with some of the most rigorous focus group data available.)

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